Tag: writing

HOW TO LIVE WITH FEAR AND BE OK

Do you experience that gripping feeling of fear that you can’t explain? Do you feel that heaviness and need to cry for no reason in the early hours of the morning when many of us are often alone. The world and the day’s business not yet distracting our thoughts and our fears.

I think many of us have experienced it, especially over the last 18 months.

It’s hard to block out the daily news of another lockdown, another virus strain, the tally of cases and deaths on top of the rest of the ‘normal’ bad news from around the world.
I have heard so many utter ‘will it ever end’, and understand how hard it can be to stay positive when there is so much uncertainty surrounding us all. In addition, the normal support and human contact with our family and friends taken away from us just adds the to enormity of the problems in our troubled minds.

But one thing will always be there. 

We always control our reaction. We can choose to curl up and give up, or we can choose to accept and make the most of what life throws at us.

I know, not always easy. 

Keep reading for some things that I do to help me stay calm and be in control of my reaction. 

JOURNALLING

Writing your thoughts and feelings down gets them out of your head and frees your mind up to be still and see any issue in a new light. Writing doesn’t give us a solution, but it helps. The old ‘problem shared problem halved’ is so true. Keep a notebook handy next to your bed for those mornings or nights when you feel anxious.

CONNECTING

Staying in regular contact with family and friends either via online, phone calls or in person if allowed. This is important for anybody living by themselves like me. You also may never know when your call may be just what the other person needs that day. Reach out. We all need to feel connected. It’s a human basic need, not a sign of weakness.

EXERCISE

Exercise releases chemicals called endorphins and triggers a happy feeling. Get yourself moving!

If you can’t get outside or to a gym, just do what you can inside. Put the music up high and dance. Do a yoga session. Get some cans out and do weights. Walk around your place. There is so much inspiration available online, just tap into it and get moving. 

If you can get outside, go for a daily walk or a bike ride. If you’re lucky enough to live near a beach, even better. The fresh air and sunshine will do your body and mind wonders. 

When Covid first hit and I had to work from home, I started a regular daily yoga routine. I have had no back issues since. I feel strong and it soothes my mind.

HOBBIES

Take time out for your existing hobbies or start new ones. Spending time on what you love doing is the best mood enhancer. 

I love being creative. My passions are writing and taking photos. 

Emerging myself in a fiction story is a wonderful way to escape the real world for just a few hours. I can bring characters and events to life with my imagination. 

Taking photos requires me to look at everything around me. My lens acts like a child’s eye, taking delight in the smallest details; a bright flower, rain drops on a branch, reflections in a rock pool, the shape of a cloud. 

HEALTHY EATING

What we put into our bodies affects both our physical and mental being. We all indulge, but I know if I eat too much chocolate or drink too much coffee, my brain gets that fuzzy feeling. It slows down and my body feels sluggish. But when I eat well, not only do I feel good about myself, my body also responds with additional energy. My problems and daily tasks no longer enormous obstacles. 

As long as I eat healthy most of the time, I can have the odd indulge. My body and mind are strong enough to accept that sometimes I just feel like chocolate and that is ok.

ACCEPTANCE

So much in life we have no control over. Especially now. 

But we can choose to accept our situation and we can control our reaction to it. 

I am a firm believer that we are all where we need to be at any moment in life. 

That does not mean we have to always just accept like a doormat. If we want change, then we can choose to change our lives. But if we do not have that control, we can accept and choose to be ok with our current situation. To still feel joy in some part of our lives. Maybe as simple as watching the rain outside dropping on the plants still living. Maybe it’s watching a good movie on Netflix, reading a brilliant book, preparing an enjoyable meal. So many simple things in life can bring us happiness. We just have to focus a little harder sometimes.

I hope, wherever you are and whatever your situation, this post has given you some helpful tips.

Stay safe and keep yourself well in body and mind. 

The Xmas Card

Photo by Danish photographer Rene Asmussen – https://www.pexels.com/@reneasmussen

Anna sat down to write on the multi coloured Christmas card she had spent over an hour selecting in the David Jones Xmas section. Baby animals jumping around the well known portly man in his red suit filled the front of the card. Anna was sure her new grandson would love it. Her first grandchild.

‘Dear Jacob’, Anna started, imagining her daughter reading out the words to the young baby who’s age was still being counted in weeks and days.

Anna wanted the card to be special. It was going to be Jacob’s first Christmas. She would much prefer to be there, to hold him tight and whisper ‘Merry Christmas my little one’ into his ear, but it was not to be this time.

She stared at the blank inside of the card. The words did not flow. Instead, wet giant silent tears formed and trickled down her cheek. Images of Jacob from the many photos and videos her daughter Lilly had sent rolled in front of her eyes. This tiny human that she had yet to meet in person had already taken up a massive chunk of her heart. He was not her own baby, but the feelings she felt for him seemed as strong as her feelings were for Lilly. It had taken Anna by surprise, and memories of holding her own babies had come flooding back. She longed to hold this baby, but it was too dangerous to travel just yet with the pandemic still raging.

She wiped her cheek and pushed the chair back, making it almost fall over. The heat in her chest spread like wildfire across her body, causing knots in her throat and redness in her cheeks. 

Damn flushes. Not now!!

Anna couldn’t control the tears or the hot flush, and raced to the bathroom, stripped down naked into the shower of welcoming cool water. While the tears flowed down her cheeks the tightness in her chest and throat eased. The roughness of the towel drying her body felt comforting.

She walked back into the kitchen and made herself a cool drink from the fresh mint leaves and soda, then pulled out the old family photo album.

Pictures of happy faces over the years, sleeping babies, birthday parties and picnics. And many Christmas’s; silver and gold adorned trees, tables laded with turkey and glazed ham, steaming pudding full of rich marinated fruit and warm creamy custard. 

Christmas in so many locations, most years in their old red brick home. But also the occasional Christmas spent abroad in the cold northern winter with snow and darkness outside, and smells of vanilla cookies, roast pork and pine needles inside. Other times with friends up north in the blistering heat, everyone in swimmers in the backyard under the tarp thrown over the Hills-hoist, and the kids playing with their water guns soaking wet and laughing.

So many memories in the photo album, but also in Anna’s heart and she knew in her children’s heart. No Christmas had ever been a sad event for the little ones, even if the adults had had their own problems to deal with. For the kids, every Christmas had always meant good times and lots of presents. 

Jacob would have many more Christmas days, and Anna knew she would celebrate with him one day. His parents would be with him this year. It would be their new little family Christmas. Their time to start their very own mesh of old and new family traditions filling albums of happy memories.

Anna sat down to write.

Dear Jacob,

You don’t know me yet, but you will soon. I am your Grandma from Sydney, where our Christmas is in summer, and the sun shines almost every day. We will meet one day, and I will read Australian books to you, and show you pictures from your mum’s homeland. Maybe one day you can visit me, and I can take you to places I am sure you will love; giant beaches and bays, shady bush lands with enormous trees reaching right up to the clouds, and so many wonderful animals that will make you squeal with delight.

Till we meet my love, I welcome you to life, and hope you have a wonderful blessed Christmas with your very own mum and dad.

Love Grandma xxx

Thoughts and Ramblings on Covid-19 -Anzac Day

 

Today is Anzac day in Australia.

People normally gather in the suburbs, in parks or near beaches to honour the many soldiers that have fought for our freedom, and there is an official parade in the city.

Not this year. Due to the restrictions we could not do this. Instead, the government urged people to honour a minute’s silence at dawn by lighting a candle and stand in their driveway or on their balconies.

This morning I woke at 5.50am with no alarm. My spirit wanted to join in and feel the connection in spite of us all being apart.

I put on my gym jacket over my pjs and made my way out on my balcony. It was still dark outside but I noticed quite a few lights out on the street and on balconies across from me.

As 6 o’clock ticked over the distant sound of the bugle playing announced the time to remember and take a moment of silence. It was both eerie and very special. I felt proud to call Australia home.

As the sun rose the only sound I could hear was the birds chirping. I breathed in the fresh air and decided now would be an excellent time to follow with a Yin yoga session. To breathe, to reflect and to look inwards.

After 30 minutes of stretching and holding poses I never thought I could do just 5 weeks ago, I watched the sky turn a bright blue. It was a beautiful autumn day, and today yoga was not enough. A brisk walk was what I needed after a week working from home, and I put on my shoes and cap and ventured out.

A walk in my neighbourhood full of bright sunshine, blue sky and trees adorned with amazing autumn colours.

What a special way to celebrate Anzac Day.

Wishing you a wonderful day wherever you are.

Stay safe and keep washing your hands.

Writing When Not Writing

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Can a writer write when not actually writing?

Of course we can. In fact, ‘non writing’ activities take up a huge chunk of our time. Many of us fill with guilt when not sitting in front of laptop writing, but to be honest so much of our writing ideas and skills come to life when we are not busy writing. These activities may ‘take us away’ from our writing, but I believe they also enrich our writing by providing ideas and additional knowledge and invaluable connections in the writing community.

Here are the top five activities that I have enjoyed ‘taking me away’ from my actual writing time this year.

Writing Groups

I am part of both a writers’ group (FAW) and a writers critique group. We meet 3 Saturday afternoons every month. The writers’ group have some excellent speakers and workshops, and the critique group provides me with valuable feedback on my writing.

Festivals

Attended the Sydney Writers festival and Writers Unleashed in the Shire. Some regional festivals sound awesome and on the radar for next year.

Participated on the committee for our own local Writers Unleashed festival this August. I learnt so much during this on how much is involved in organising an event like this, and connected with a huge number of fantastic writers.

Newsletters & Social Media

Sourcing materials on educational and informative news on all things writing for the monthly newsletter for FAW Sutherland has been fun and increased my own knowledge on what goes on out there in the writers world.

As Social Media officer for the Writers Unleashed I have put together a large number of posts to promote our festival and its many fantastic speakers. This has provided me with new skills and knowledge that I can now use on my own social media updates.

Author Book Launches

Many writers are introverts and public speaking does not always come easy. Attending book launches not only is a way to network and meet likeminded people, but also a way to learn what an audience enjoy and want to hear at book launches. What works and what doesn’t. Small gatherings of close friends and publishing supporters at book stores or libraries seem a winner. Even better with a bit of champagne to relax everyone! I frequently visit our local bookstore Anna’s Shop Around the Corner in Cronulla for some amazing talks. A true gem for writers!

Books & Podcasts

I love Podcasts. They make commuting a breeze! My favourites are @So You Want to be a Writer and Talking Aussie Boooks.

Reading as many books across a varied number of genres is essential. It hones our own craft and supports other writers.

To get as many into my busy days I use different media. My Kindle when travelling light. My audio when driving/exercising or doing housework. And a real book, the best, when I do find time to sit and enjoy the read. Which unfortunately is not always easy working full time as a planner and trying to fit in my writing in my spare time left.

Courses

Any writing course will hone your craft even if not in the genre you’re currently writing in. My MS is a romance suspense novel, but I write short stories across various genres.

My most recent course was on publishing children’s books and was fantastic. Learning expands your mind and never wasted. The AWC have so many great courses both in class and online. Check them out and build up your writer’s tool-kit.

Of course in the end actually sitting down to write is the only thing that will get your MS finished. But all of above still assist when you do sit in front of your laptop.

At least by writing about what gets me away from writing I actually got some writing done!

What do you find gets you away from writing , but also helps you in your writing?

The Tale of Old Silverback

🔥🔥 HOT OFF THE PRESS 🔥🔥

“King of the forest, old Silverback, fell down with a thump on the soft mulch-littered ground, and the whole forest held their breath. They realised something was wrong.”

A teaser for my children’s short story which I am SUPER excited to announce is now finally available in print as part of the Sutherland FAW anthology Webs of Life; a collection of short stories written by the many talented writers in the group.

It has taken several months of planning and organizing, and we can’t wait to officially launch the book at our Writers Unleashed festival on Saturday 17th August at Gymea Tradies in Sydney.

Also had my first taste of a writer’s reading yesterday. My workplace organised a BBQ and had me read the story. Was nerve racking and exciting at the same time. Happy to say the story was well received with lots of laughter and congratulations from everyone.

Enjoyed sharing that part of my life with my colleagues. To work at a place that encourages and supports employees in a life outside of work is heart-warming.

I’m feeling a bit more like a real writer today and it feels damn good.

If you would like a copy please DM me. Pre-orders before the festival at a discounted rate of $12 plus postage.

Deadly Destination

 

train into fog

For centuries it had been frozen in time and in structure. Hidden from civilisation beneath the cold ice; covered in layers of bone chilling snow. Its weapon harmless. Unable to kill. A frozen assassin.

Global warming slowly changed the killer.  Like a hibernating bear, the deadly bacteria stretched and yawned back to life. Slowly leaking out. Coming to the surface. Hungry. Deep in the Canadian mountains it started its roar.

~~~

The train left the station every carriage filled with hundreds of tourists dressed in hiking gear, expensive camera’s adorning their necks and carrying heavy backpacks. The buzz and excitement permeated every part of the train. Strangers connecting over maps and old travel stories.

It was Linda and Paul’s first hiking trip. They kept to themselves; cocooned in their bubble of young passion and excited about their future life together. Paul touched his shirt pocket for the hundredth time. The tiny box still there containing a dainty ring with the most expensive pink diamond he could afford on his meagre intern salary.

Linda looked pale. Paler than usual. Her long dark hair contrasting her porcelain skin. She had wanted to stay in bed that morning, but she couldn’t disappoint Paul.

The train slowed down, stopping at the last station before the climb up the steep mountain covered in an eery fog making it impossible to see to the top. Like it had disappeared. Hiding something.

‘Last stop. A ten minute break for anyone who wants to stretch or grab a snack at the station cafe,’ the voice came over the loudspeaker.

‘Let’s hop off. I need to pee’ Linda urged, feeling the wave of nausea that had plagued her for the last few days.

They jumped off holding hands and made their way to the far end of the platform. Paul noticed Linda shaking.

‘You don’t look well, Linda?’ concern written all over his young face. She just made it into the cubicle, head spinning when her insides rushed up her throat into the rust coloured toilet bowl.

‘Are you ok?’ she heard Paul’s voice outside.

When she didn’t answer he barged into the cubicle.

She looked up at him. The realisation hit. Late period!

Paul took off his neck tie, wet it under the tap and wiped her face covered in perspiration.

‘I think I might be pregnant Paul,’ Linda said quietly.

‘Oh My God! Yes!’ Paul hugged her as they sat huddled on the grimy bathroom tiles oblivious to the ear piercing sound of the train whistle.

~~~

‘A trip of a lifetime missed by 1 second, but two lives saved ‘ according to the evening news read by a grim faced reporter.

‘A tourist train met with a deadly destination today. SOS signals from the driver at 11am sent rescue teams to investigate. No survivors except a young couple who missed re-boarding at Trinytie. All carriages covered in unidentified pus. Cause of death unknown.’

Review of ‘A Lifetime of Impossible Days’ by Tabitha Bird

The sign of a great book for me is when I can’t wait to read how it finishes, but when I do I want to continue reading and stay in the story; stay with the characters that have come to life, come into my life. When seeing ‘the end’ makes me feel both sad and good inside.

That is exactly how I felt reading and finishing A Lifetime of Impossible Days by Tabitha Bird. One of the better books I have read lately; a book that will stay with me for a long time.

It’s a beautifully written story about the Willas, one female character during three stages of her life; eight, thirty-three and ninety-three. Each character with their own distinct voice yet linked together expertly. It’s a story of life, healing and acceptance woven into a wonderful concept of time travel and being able to meet your younger and older self.

Some of my favourite lines in the book were:

‘Fabulous wrinkles from talking and laughing and crying. Living and wrinkles, they go together’

‘Because it’s good to share ourselves. That’s what happens over bikkies and a good cuppa’

I could go on but I will let you read the book and find your own little gems.

I can highly recommend this book. It’s sad and uplifting, and totally draws you into the world of the Willas.

In the back of the book there is a list of book club questions.

This one intrigued me:

If you could time travel back in time, what would you tell your younger self?

For me it would be ‘ Don’t stress about what you can’t control or change. Most challenges are not life threatening and work themselves out with time’

What would you tell your younger self?

Love to hear your answers, or feedback if you have already read this great book.

Three Little Words

heart-shape-1714807__340

‘I love you!’

Charlene longed to hear those three words, but after nine months of going out with Mark, she was still waiting. She loved Mark, and many times she had almost blurted the words out. But she worried he would freak out and run. So many had in the past. Mark had been single since his wife died 4 years ago. She knew she had to go slow.

‘Valentine’s day. I’ll tell him then,’ Charlene planned.

‘Go get yourself some sexy underwear,’ her crazy girlfriend Nicky had suggested.

That’s how Charlene found herself for the first time in a sexy lingerie shop. More of a cotton brief girl she never understood why something ten times smaller cost ten times more.

‘Can I help you?’ the beautiful young shop assistant enquired.

‘I’m just browsing’ Charlene muttered.

Didn’t stop the assistant. ‘Can I offer you a measure?’ she asked. ‘So important to wear the right fit or you will never feel comfortable.’

Two minutes later Charlene was in the change room being measured every which way.

‘Is this for a special occasion?’ the assistant asked.

‘Yes it is,’ Charlene replied without elaborating.

‘You’re a standard 14C. Let me show you a few of our special items.’

Before Charlene knew what was happening, the assistant led her to the far corner of the shop. The mood was ‘special occasion’. A large ruby red electric candle sent flickering shadows onto the exquisite lingerie making the pearls and sequins sparkle.

‘How about this one?’ The assistant held up a black lacy one-piece. ‘Try it on if you like it.’

Charlene had to admit it was a big step up from her usual big cotton briefs, but wondered how she would ever get to the bathroom in time with that on.

As if the assistant read her mind she held up the crutch area ‘easy access too for emergency visits to the bathroom.’

Charlene blushed. What does this young woman know about emergency? Her bladder turned into a roaring faucet as soon as she put her key in the front door.

‘Or maybe a set like this one?’ the assistant suggested removing a burgundy lacy bra and knicker set from the rack. ‘Made to hold everything in place.’

With gravity pulling her body parts in the wrong direction, and a sweet tooth adding to the roundness of her maturing body, Charlene liked her bits being held in place.

She struggled to get the items on in the change room, but with the help and praise from the assistant she finally looked at herself in the 3-way mirror. At first only for a few seconds, avoiding the full inspection. Then with surprise. Even with her cotton brief underneath she had to admit she looked damn good. She stood straighter and noticed even her eyes sparkled. She felt proud and looked straight into her own eyes in the mirror.

‘I love you! I am buying this for you old girl. Happy Valentine’s day Charlene.’

 

 

 

 

 

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